don’t be a jerk

How to make a broomball stick

Folks keep asking me how to make a proper broomball stick, and I used to be able to just google a link and pass that on. But, as it turns out, in the past few years broomball, the game that I didn’t even play sober the first seven times I played it seems to somehow have become a semi-legitimate sport. Thus, there are now regulation rules, leagues, and, most importantly, sticks.
 
However, real broomball - the version of the game that is played by fat, drunk guys and angry, bitter women - is played with a makeshift puck and actual sweeping brooms reinforced with duct tape. So here’s how to make a classic broomball stick:

 
First, get yourself a broom and a roll of standard duct tape. I didn’t look so hard and was only able to find a cheap broom with a plastic guard. It’s better if your find a classic broom with a round top and no plastic - all wood and bristles:


 
You don’t need to remove the plastic thingey; I just chose to. Please ignore the parrot. The parrot has nothing to do with the procedure.


 
Now get your duct tape-

-and start taping the head of the broom starting from the handle and taping towards th-

-Ed O’Neill! Shoo! Get off the broom!


 
Start taping towards the-

Okay, now that’s just indecent.


 
I’m serious, Ed. I’ll play with you later. Daddy really needs to finish this or no one’s going to come to his birthday party.


 
Anyway, here’s what finished broomball stick looks like:


 

In case your wondering. That’s an almond that Ed is eating.

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