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2.) “…it’s now or never…”

Hi! We’re the new batch of pickled eggs that Dave is making. He’s already finished eating the last batch he made. In fact, one night he ate so many pickled eggs that he had a vinegar-induced hangover the whole next day. Sometimes Dave’s dumber than a goldfish. Seriously, if you put too much food in [...]

1.) “It’s my life…”

Hi, I’m Suzy. I’m Dave’s motorcycle. Do you know why he named me “Suzy”? It’s because I’m a Suzuki SV650. Isn’t that creative? I think that’s so creative. By the way, I’m being totally sarcastic right now. We motorcycles are usually very sarcastic. 

Hi, I’m Herbert! I’m Dave’s minivan! He named me “Herbert” because I look [...]