don’t be a jerk

This is me and the P.Funk man himself. That’s a lemon cake in his right hand, by the way. I was trying to look kinda like a douchebag in this picture, but not like this much of a douchebag. Doesn’t matter though cause I think G. Clinton here draws most of the attention away from me in this pic.

He’s a weird guy. A very very weird guy.

* * *
 
Ed O’Neill has officially started to imitate me. True to my research, he’s not a great talker like an African Grey, but he does mumble quite a few things consistently, usually in a higher, almost feminine voice:

“Step up”
(usually when he’s climbing something or he accidentally ends up on the floor and wants to be picked up)

“Hello”
(no context here. He just mumbles it randomly)

“aaaAAAAAaaaa”
(This sounds like a small woman screaming. He lets out one of these when he falls to the floor, and sometimes when he is swinging on his swing thingy.)

He also says a few other things, but I can’t make the phrases out.

Now his new thing is “What are you doing?”, only he says it in a really deep voice (or at least as deep as he can go) which I can only assume is his imitation of me. I assume this because anytime my friends decide to imitate me, they do it in a ridiculously deep and almost retarded sounding voice. If you only knew of me through my friends’ descriptions, you’d think I talked like Buffalo Bill from Silence of the Lambs.

So here is what wakes me up at 7am every morning:

“Hello”
“Hello”
(various unintelligible, but vaguely english sounding mumbles)
“step up”
“Hello”

“What are you doing?”

- it’s unnerving, but it really gets me out of bed. Friggin…small green creature. In cage next to my bed. Weirding me out.

* * *
 
Alison got booted from Project Runway last night. BULLSHIT! Not only is she more talented that Vincent, she’s also not insane. What were Heidi and Co thinking!?! I can’t believe I’m getting this worked up about a fashion design show. Maybe I’ll watch some hockey tonight for testoster-balance.

I liked Alison because she looks just like a blond version of former LCCer, Tanya Peng.

On that note, Mike G and I are in complete agreement that Kayne Gillaspie:

- looks like our very own Matt Hill. I don’t have any pictures of Matt HIll, but here is a shitty screenshot of him from Dr. Miracles:


 
There you have it. They’re basically twins. Only Kayne is a little bit gayer. But only a little bit.

On a final note: every time they show Kayne and Robert together I get more and more worried that they’re going to start fucking right there on my TV screen. Those two are soooo into each other. So says my straight male intuition.

* * *
 
A bit late, but here are some photos from Tofufest last Saturday:

Ill Again rockin’ tha house.

 
Mad-dog Stan.

 
Last call. Double fisting.

 
M. Senzaki

 
Lot of Mad-dogs around here tonight.

 
Ray and Marv. On a related note, Marv doesn’t think that Kayne and Matt Hill look anything like each other. That’s the craziest thing I’ve ever heard, and sometimes…sometimes I just feel like screaming that at her. But then she looks so cute in this photo, so I don’t scream it at her. I just hold it in and hope that the anger goes away. And if I see her I say “Hi” and smile and all that, but as soon as she goes away, the anger comes back.

 
Randy, Jose, and Daniel. Or is it Randy, Daniel, and Jose? Goddammit. I keep getting those two mixed up.

 
Blackalicious from the back side.

 
Tim and Sam. Being idiots.